In many ways, I've always known the truth about freedom -- how to gain it, where to pursue it, who I need to be to chase it, where the answers are. I learned many lessons about my self over the course of working the exercises in AROUSE and painting and writing through the process. Perhaps, the most important lesson I learned -- I knew the answers all along. Those answers about who I am, what I need, how I crave to express myself, how I yearn for true, wild freedom. I could've found those answers, at any time, just by listening to the whispers in my mind -- the ones who are so faint that you miss them when otherwise occupied. The ones that dance through my unconscious in dreams and symbols. The ones that sing their wisdom to me in one voice.
But, despite all this inner knowledge, there was a lack of trust, until the prompts and exercises of AROUSE asked me to look within, to reconnect, to act as if I were the person I wanted to be. And, most important of all, encouraged me to listen to my inner voice. To find my muse. To find my passion. And, I had a surprise -- I have PASSION in spades!
I find that I'm in a place of evolution, or metamorphosis, or whatever term you wish to use. I've learned both who I'm not, and who I don't want to be. Now, I move toward becoming who I am, and who I DO want to be. Today, I know what that woman looks like -- she is genuine and natural. She is beautiful and feminine. She is flawed and damaged. She is bright and energetic. She is strong and she is vulnerable. She is passionate. She is wild. And, she is FREE.
I'm always a little sad at endings. In my mind, its best to take the time to grieve any loss -- to reflect on lessons learned, experiences gathered. But, also to remember that a door closing brings your attention to the one that opens. What doors are opening for you?